Why is it so hard?

Why is it so hard to stay on track? I know what I need to do and I WANT to do it but making those right choices are hard. I need to find a balance between wanting and doing. I am struggling with my eating choices. I'm not completely out of control but I have gained weight back and feel generally blah about myself. I have been having horrible headaches and know that they are connected to my weight. I have a hard time drinking enough water in the summer (which you would think would be the opposite). I need someone to challenge me- to walk along beside me-to hold me accountable. To ask- have I been to the gym (no, i haven't in months), have I recorded what I have eaten (no, I haven't in at least a month)? So, is there anyone who can help me out and step up to the challenge with me?